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Updates
Brian's post (Jeff's brother) on Cara's Facebook Saturday, February 3, 1:17 PM—
Here is Cara's Complete Obituary
Cara Posey Nalepa, 36, of Brownstown, PA passed away peacefully on Friday, February 1, 2013 at the Mount Joy Hospice Center after a lengthy battle with colon cancer. Born in Louisville, Kentucky on August 6, 1976, she is survived by her husband Jeffrey Nalepa, and their daughters Cori and Zoey.
Cara devoted her life’s vocation to the physical and mental care of others. After graduating from East Mecklenburg High School in Charlotte, NC in 1994, Cara attended Appalachian State University in Boone, NC, earned a degree in Psychology from the University of North Carolina – Charlotte in 1999. Furthering her education, she graduated from York (PA) College in 2005 with a Nursing degree.
Cara practiced nursing at Lancaster (PA) General Hospital, along with Palmetto Richland Baptist and the WJB Dorn Veterans Medical Center – both in Columbia, SC.
Paramount to Cara was her husband and children. When she was not caring for her family, Cara enjoyed the outdoors, hiking, music, movies, and vacations at the beach. She loved to travel to different destinations to enjoy her passion for culinary delights.
Cara is also survived by her mother Susan Posey of Charlotte, NC; father Jerry Posey of Amarillo, TX, brothers Brian and Talainia Posey of Rock Hill, SC and Chris and Carolyn Posey of Indian Trail, NC; in-laws Linda Nalepa of Lexington, SC and Roger and Robin Nalepa of Newark, DE; grandmothers Mary York and Dean and Bob Tellman of Louisville, KY and numerous extended family and many friends.
The Family would like to recognize and thank the following friends for all their care and generous support of Cara; Kyle and Amanda Cassidy, Gerald and Britton Menaquale, Tom and Donna Ponessa, all of Lancaster.
We are all grateful for the care and support of the South Carolina Oncology Associates, especially Dr. Fred Kudrick and his staff. Cara fought hard and they were there with her every step of the way.
Much appreciation goes out to the staff of Mt. Joy Hospice Center. Their care of Cara in her final days provided comfort, peace, and dignity. Memorial contributions can be made to them at Hospice and Community Care of Lancaster County, 685 Good Drive, P.O. Box 4125, Lancaster, PA 17604-4125 or at www.hospiceandcommunitycare.org.
A celebration of Cara’s life will be held at
Charles F. Snyder Funeral Home
414 East King Street
Lancaster, Pennsylvania, 17602
on Saturday, February 9.
The family will receive friends from 1:00PM to 3:00PM,
and will be followed by a memorial service at 3:00PM.
Flowers are welcome and can be sent to the funeral home.
Online condolences can be made at www.snyderfuneralhome.com
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Friday, February 1, 1:08 PM—
It appears that the news has already spread, but Cara lost her battle with cancer today. She passed peacefully and without pain at 9:35 this morning. The world lost a shining star today, a true example of how one should live their life, with love and compassion for everyone she crossed paths with. She made me the person I am today and was leading our daughters down the path. I know tears will flow, but try and celebrate a life that was cut down way to soon. We are all better people from knowing her. My heart is empty right now, but I am sure I will fill it back when I look at Cori and Zoey every day and see Cara in both of them. That is the best I can do for now. Heavy hearted and short on words. There is no more pain for my sweet Cara- jeff
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Friday, February 1, 5:37 AM—
Back at inpatient hospice. Caras health deteriorated very quickly once were home. Ambulance had to bring her back. She is heavily sedated and sleeps nearly all the time. Seems to be in no pain, but does get very restless when the Valium wears off. Been up all night with her with my brother. She is beyond weak at this point. She does not respond to me, the girls, or anyone else. Shallow breaths, cold sweats, very high heart rate, but no true pulse in hands or feet. No blood pressure that they are able to pin down because it is so faint. Very hard to see her like this. That's the update, sorry it's not better news- Jeff
News on Thursday, January 31, 3:21 PM—
A neighbor of the Nalepas reported after speaking with Jeff's mom, Linda, that as of yesterday Cara's condition had reverted to where she was last week, and the visiting hospice nurse advised her to go back into their care. Jeff agreed, but wanted one last night at home around friends and family. They took her back to hospice today.
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Monday, January 28, 10:31 AM—
Did not want to post this until it actually happened. Didn't want to jinx it. Cara fought so hard that she is going Home! After many nights that it was touch and go, she began to regain her strength, the haze lifted, she began to eat, and each day got a little better. All meds are now pills or liquids. Did not think this was possible, but as I have said before- we fight until we have nothing left, and then we fight some more.- jeff
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Saturday, January 26, 7:53 PM—
She is having a better day. Raw oysters and seafood chowder from Gibraltar.
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Thursday, January 24, 1:59 PM—
Cara has about finished her battle with cancer, like so many before her, and sadly many more after her, she will not win this battle. Meeting with the doctors today, they informed me that Cara's body is shutting down. This could take hours or days. She still is on her pain medication so she is relatively still. She still fights though and at time is restless and trying to sit. Just a few minutes ago in a brief moment of clarity she sat up and looked at me. I asked her who i was, and she said "jeff", and smiled as much as she could muster. I asked her who her best friend was and she said "you", I asked who her other best friend was and she responded -"Mandy is". It made my day. She is the absolute best that this world has to offer, I know nobody who does not adore her. Someone once said "life is tough, get a helmet", they were not kidding. I hope anybody who is in the area is able to come see her in her final days, it is now just a matter of time. Coaches say that if you give everything you have and leave it on the field there in no shame in losing. Cara gave all she could, and never expected much in return. She lost a battle that could not be one. She lost with dignity and her head held high. I know people will shed tears, but try and celebrate her life- play with your kids, have a glass of wine, smile and laugh as you tell stories about her. I will tell the story of when she waived down a police car in Baltimore thinking it was a cab, and still proceeded to ask the cop to drive us to our hotel. She is not gone yet, she will fight till the final breath, because that is all our family knows how to do. A wife, mother, nurse, friend, daughter, shoulder to lean on, a smiling face, she is, and always will be the best woman I have ever known.-jeff
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Monday, January 21, 8:47 AM—
bed is so bad she stole the couch. sleeping like an angel...pain level down, sleepiness up. :)
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Sunday, January 20, 6:50 PM—
Sorry I have not posted, I have ended up sick with some kind of flu bug. Probably just run down. Cara is still in the inpatient hospice center. There are time that she is nearly pain free, but when the headaches come back, they come back strong. Hopefully it's all the meds, but she does seem to be confused at times. She knows who everybody is and what's going on, but spaces out a bit and it is a bit scary. Hopefully even with the grogginess we can take her home soon. Real food and a comfy bed would do her well. At a point we can do everything they do here at home. Thanks for the messages, prayers, thoughts, and visits. The fight is still in her, but is starting to wear down. It is truly devastating to see someone so strong become so weak, to see someone who always helped others need help to do the basics, for someone so vibrant and energic seem so frail. Tuck your loved ones in tonight and hug them till it hurts. Be grateful that no matter what your family has going on, it could be worse. Illness can make the strongest people so weak, and their loved ones feel helpless beyond belief. We are not the only people with loved ones that are ill, and we send positive energy and thoughts to all that are hurting right now. Thanks everybody- Jeff
Robin's post (Jeff's step-mom) on Cara's Facebook Sunday, January 20, 5:02 PM—
I thought I'd share an update since Jeff is sick and not up to it. (He's doing a bit better today. Hoping that improvement continues.) Cara is still at inpatient hospice. I'm sitting next to her while she sleeps. When I arrived, she was pain-free!!! But unfortunately the headache has returned. I'm praying for her doctors that they find the right combo for elimination of the pain but some degree of alertness. Then she can go home!
Love to you all who have been such awesome support for Cara, Jeff and the girls!
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Friday, January 18, 2:00 PM—
feeling a little better this afternoon. micky d's always helps. she can open her eye about half way but the light still hurts it. i think she looks beautiful! she is my world- jeff
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Thursday, January 17, 10:52 AM—
Cara has had a rough morning, headaches are excruciating, which also brings on the nausea. Imitrex seems to be the only help, along with depacote liquid. She is still very exhausted. I'm afraid this fight is starting to take its toll on her. Hopefully some answers today to at least keep the headaches at bay. At this point she can deal with sleeping most of the day, as long as her head does not pound. I'm here round the clock, so if there are any messages you want her to hear, I read all of them to her. Drs and nurses are doing their best, but sometimes the questions have no answers. She is sleeping now and seems very peaceful. Visitors are welcome, just be warned that she will probably be sleeping or groggy while you are here. The fight is not done, she would never allow that. Keep her in your thoughts and prayers and send her any positive energy you can! She is tired, but by no means ready to quit. -Jeff
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Wednesday, January 16, 1:57 PM—
They just showed to give a Cara a message, this place really is taking care of her. Now I'm jealous-jeff
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Tuesday, January 15, 8:16 PM—
Here is the latest. Cara has been admitted to the lancaster mt. Joy inpatient hospice. She is only here so they figure out her medication to control her headaches. As soon as they figure that out she will go back home. She is fighting her butt off. Need to find to find the crossroads between terrible headaches and being knocked out. I'll keep everybody posted- Jeff
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Friday, January 11, 12:15 PM—
Cara should be going home today, they are getting her prescriptions written and discharge orders ready. Some good news today though- there is a posibility that the migraines and problems with her eye were caused by a mini stroke to her eye muscle. This means the treatment for the headaches is working ( Valium, compazine, GAE). This could mean the cancer has not entered the spinal fluid. This could have been the small miracle we had hoped for, fingers still crossed though. Plan is still the same however, get her home and get involved with hospice. But she might have earned herself some more time. I've said before that she will not stop fighting, she will not go gently into the night. She is still very tired and her right eye is shut, but they told us the eye should repair itself over time. Keep the thoughts and prayers coming. We needed a little good new and maybe this is it. Thank you everybody, it has been an emotional roller coaster, but I read her the messages and it lifts our spirits every day.- jeff
Jeff's post on Cara's Facebook Wednesday, January 9, 7:20 PM—
Bad news today, turns out the headaches and vision problems were caused by the cancer spreading to her spinal fluid. There is no treatment for this. Job now is to figure how to manage the pain and keep her comfortable. Getting her home and starting on hospice is the next step. Hopefully that is Thursday. One person can only fight so hard, and she could not have fought any harder. She is the best that this world has to offer and she will fight to the bitter end, but comfort and time with the girls, family, and friends is #1 priority. Thank you for the thoughts and prayers- sometimes it's out of our control. She seems to be in good spirits, but I'm sure she is numb, sad, mad, and confused right now. Texts and messages do help, bring them on! Hug your loved ones and squeeze them tight- Jeff |
